Try a munch.

First question a newbie might have – what on earth is a munch? The mere sound of it probably makes you cringe. But actually, a munch could be your best first step into the BDSM/Fetish scene, especially if you’re a little nervous, discreet, live in a conservative community or aren’t into loud clubs.

A munch is a social get-together for people interested in the scene, usually held at a public venue like a quiet bar or restaurant. They aren’t decked out in full fetish regalia – rather, tend to wear their regular street clothes maybe with a hint of their lifestyle –and talk about everything from paddles to politics, from ropes to recipes.

Why a munch?

Munches are safe. You meet others in a group, in a public place and can use your own instincts to decide who is who and how involved you want to get.

You can ask questions and learn. Chances are there will be people with all levels of experience, from all age groups, eager to share their knowledge with newcomers.

You get a sense of belonging. Munches are about community. They are welcoming and give you the opportunity to make friends with similar interests. No judgment, no fear.

It’s real-life contact. You get away from your computer and out of the house. Way better than an online fantasy life.

Not all munches are created equal

Now, there are all kinds of opinions about munches – some positive, others negative. There is a perception in some circles that munches attract geeks, misfits or people lacking social skills. While this may be true in certain cases, munches nevertheless are a great initiation to the scene. And who knows… you just may luck out on one of the many good ones.

      Issue 59 of Skin Two Magazine has a great 6-page exposee, “Meet Your Local Pervs” on the ins and outs of munches, the history and impact. And of course, the pros and cons. Definitely worth picking up.

Now the big question…

How do you find a munch near you? Well, it may take a little work, but here are my suggestions:

    * Google “BDSM munch” + your area and you’ll get a surprising number of hits (REMEMBER: use quotes around “BDSM munch” for an optimal search.
    * Join and make friends at www.FetLife.com, the online BDSM & Fetish Community for Kinksters by Kinksters.
    * SkinTwo.com has an online directory with munch listings around the world. Though not much is up there right now, I am sure that, with time, more will be posted. Or if you run a munch, why not post at: http://directory.skintwo.co.uk/index.php?option=com_sobi2&catid=148&Itemid=45